Couples and relationship counseling

Healthy relationships require effort and commitment from both partners. Relationship counseling provides tools to navigate challenges, improve communication, and strengthen emotional bonds, helping couples nurture their connection and enhance their partnership.

Counseling helps resolve conflicts and rebuild trust.

Professionals offer strategies to improve communication skills.

Therapy strengthens emotional bonds between partners.

Maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship can often feel like a daunting task. While love and companionship are vital components of emotional health, it's important to remember that good relationships require ongoing effort and commitment from both partners.

Seeking the guidance of a relationship counselor, also known as couple's therapy, is an invaluable step in strengthening your connection. These professionals offer tools and strategies to help couples navigate challenges, improve communication, and deepen their emotional bond. In this article, we will explore how to find relationship and couples counselors near you, ensuring that you have the support needed to nurture and enhance your partnership.

What is relationship counseling?

Relationship counseling, commonly referred to as “couples therapy", “couples counseling," or "marriage counseling", is a psychotherapy approach aimed at helping partners tackle and settle conflicts in their relationship. This counseling offers a secure and unbiased environment where couples can delve into their emotions, enhance communication, and gain insight into each other's viewpoints.

The primary purpose of seeing a psychologist for marriage counseling is to attend sessions that help individuals work through their conflicts, whether they stem from communication issues, trust problems, or differing values and goals. It’s important for couples to know that therapy is a collaborative process; progress may take time and requires openness and commitment from both partners. Additionally, confidentiality is a key component of therapy, allowing individuals to share their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. This process can lead to greater intimacy and a more resilient partnership.

Who needs couples or relationship counseling?

Many couples encounter challenges that can feel overwhelming, and recognizing the need for professional guidance from a couples counselor before divorce is imminent is the first step toward healing mental health and growth. Here are some signs that may indicate it’s time to seek help from a licensed marriage or relationship counseling sessions, according to AARP:

  • Frequent Arguments: If you find that disagreements occur regularly and escalate quickly, it may be a sign that underlying issues need to be addressed with the help of a counselor.
  • Financial Issues: Disagreements over finances can create a significant strain on a relationship. If money matters are causing stress or conflict, counseling can help couples navigate these discussions and find common ground.
  • Desire to Divorce: If one or both partners are contemplating separation or divorce, seeking counseling can provide a space to explore these feelings and assess whether the relationship can be salvaged.
  • Co-parenting Issues: Couples who share children may face unique challenges when it comes to co-parenting. Seeing a family therapist for counseling can assist in developing effective communication strategies and parenting plans that benefit the children. Family therapy can be for just the parents, just the children, or for the entire family unit, even step-parents. In fact, this type of therapy is best when all members of the family are involved.
  • Desire to Strengthen the Relationship: Even couples who are not experiencing major problems may seek counseling to enhance their connection, improve communication, and build a more resilient partnership.
  • Pre-marital or Civil Union Advice: Engaging in counseling before tying the knot can help couples address potential issues, set expectations, and build a strong foundation for their future together.

When to seek professional relationship counseling?

Regardless of which type of therapy you and your partner need, knowing when to seek professional relationship counseling is essential for maintaining a healthy partnership. While some couples may wait until problems escalate and they are on the verge of divorce, it's important to recognize that seeking help can be a proactive measure, especially during significant life changes or ongoing conflicts. Here are some key situations when couples should consider reaching out for professional support:

  • Abuse: If there is any form of emotional, physical, or psychological abuse, it is crucial to seek professional help immediately. Safety should always be the top priority, and counseling can provide resources and support for those affected.
  • Constant Critique: If one or both partners feel consistently criticized or find themselves wanting to escape the relationship, it may indicate deeper issues that need to be addressed. Counseling can help couples explore these feelings and work toward resolution.
  • Major Life Changes: Significant events such as pregnancy, moving, job changes, or the loss of a loved one can put stress on a relationship. Seeking counseling during these transitions can help couples navigate the challenges and adjustments that arise.
  • Communication Breakdown: If communication has become ineffective or hostile, and conflicts are frequent, it may be time to seek professional help. A counselor can provide tools to improve communication and foster understanding.
  • Loss of Intimacy: If partners notice a decline in emotional or physical intimacy, it can be a sign that issues need to be addressed. Counseling can help couples reconnect and explore underlying concerns.
  • Desire for Growth: Even if a relationship seems stable, couples may choose to seek counseling to enhance their connection, address minor issues, or prepare for future challenges. This proactive approach can strengthen the relationship and promote resilience.

Techniques used in couples counseling?

In relationship counseling or couples counseling, there are various techniques that can help couples navigate their challenges and foster healthier communication patterns. These methods are designed to facilitate understanding, promote empathy, and encourage constructive dialogue between partners. Here are some common techniques that Talkspace notes are frequently used in licensed relationship counseling sessions:

Gottman Method

Developed by Dr. John Gottman, this approach focuses on building a sound relationship house by enhancing friendship, managing conflict, and creating shared meaning. It emphasizes the importance of positive interactions and helps couples develop skills to resolve conflicts effectively.


Example: Partner repeats, “You feel overwhelmed about work stress.”

Reflective Listening

This technique involves one partner expressing their thoughts and feelings while the other actively listens and reflects back what they have heard. This process fosters understanding and ensures that both partners feel heard and validated.


Example: Partner repeats, “You feel overwhelmed about work stress.”

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

EFT aims to help couples understand and reorganize their emotional responses to each other. By identifying negative interaction patterns, couples can learn to create a more secure emotional bond, enhancing intimacy and connection.


Example: Partner reassures during moments of insecurity.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

In the context of relationship counseling, CBT helps couples identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to conflict. By addressing these cognitive distortions, partners can develop healthier ways of interacting.


Example: Replacing assumptions with facts prevents unnecessary arguments.

Communication Skills Training

This technique focuses on teaching couples effective communication strategies, such as using "I" statements, active listening, and assertiveness. Improving communication skills can significantly reduce misunderstandings and foster a more supportive environment.


Example: Using “I feel upset” instead of blaming statements

Imago Relationship Therapy

This approach encourages partners to explore their childhood experiences and how they influence their current relationship dynamics. By understanding these patterns, couples can work toward healing and developing a deeper connection.


Example: Recognizing childhood neglect influences reactions to criticism.

Finding couples counselling near you

There are several avenues to explore when seeking therapy. First, consider searching for local therapists who specialize in relationship issues—many professionals offer in-person sessions and can be found through online directories, local mental health organizations, or referrals from friends and family. Additionally, online couples counseling options have gained popularity, providing flexibility and accessibility for couples who may prefer virtual sessions from the comfort of their own homes. Various platforms connect couples with licensed therapists who focus on relationship problems, making it easier to find a suitable match.

How to choose the right couples counselor

Selecting a skilled therapist can strengthen your relationship. Consider these tips:

  • Choose a therapist specializing in couples counseling and proven techniques like Gottman or EFT.
  • Prioritize someone who fosters a safe, neutral, and non-judgmental environment.
  • Seek therapists offering practical communication and conflict resolution strategies.
  • Check for flexibility with scheduling, including online or evening sessions.
  • Ensure both partners feel comfortable and aligned with the therapist’s approach.

By choosing the right counselor, you and your partner can work towards resolving conflicts, enhancing communication, and building a stronger connection.

How to choose the right couples counselor

FAQs

Understanding the role of therapists and effective strategies for resolving relationship issues can empower couples to take positive steps toward healing and growth. Here are answers to common questions about couples therapy:

  • Can therapists help with relationship issues?

    Yes, therapists are trained to help couples navigate various relationship issues. They provide a safe and neutral space for partners to express their feelings, explore underlying conflicts, and develop effective communication strategies. Through various therapeutic techniques, therapists can guide couples in understanding each other's perspectives and finding constructive solutions to their problems.

  • How do we fix relationship problems?

    Fixing relationship problems often involves open communication, active listening, and a willingness to understand each other's viewpoints. Couples can benefit from identifying the root causes of their issues, setting aside time for meaningful conversations, and practicing empathy. Seeking professional counseling can also be a valuable step, as a therapist can provide tools and techniques to help couples address their challenges and strengthen their bond. Additionally, engaging in activities that promote connection, such as date nights or shared hobbies, can help rekindle intimacy and improve the overall relationship dynamic.

  • How long does couples therapy typically take?

    The duration varies; some couples resolve issues in weeks, while others may benefit from ongoing sessions over several months. It depends on the complexity of the issues and the couple’s commitment.

  • Can couples therapy work if only one partner attends?

    While it’s ideal for both partners to participate, one partner attending therapy alone can still foster personal growth and positively influence the relationship dynamic.

  • Is couples therapy effective for non-married couples?

    Yes! Couples therapy benefits all types of relationships, including those who are dating, cohabiting, or in long-term partnerships, by addressing communication, trust, and conflict resolution.

Dr. Rob Rohatsch, MD, is a Board-Certified Emergency Medicine physician and urgent care executive. He earned his MD from Jefferson Medical College, currently serves on multiple boards and is Solv’s Chief Medical Officer.

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2 sources

Solv has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We avoid using tertiary references.

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